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Don’t ignore the white elephant in the room! Or the LED princess wands. Or the feather headdress. Or the … wait, where am I? No, Dorothy, you’re not in Kansas anymore … thank GOD!

You’re at one of THE parties of the year. The Bizarre Bazaar, a schmorgasboard of camaraderie, calamity and candor conceived by a few of the most twisted and creative minds I’ve ever encountered. Stumble your way to Porch next Saturday, April 12. Take a deep breath and pray it will be your last … no, your first, as you become a part of one of the most interesting birthday shindigs I’ve been witness to.

For the noobs, this is the annual Dancing Rams birthday party, in honor of “Aries Gone Wild” Wendy and Nora, and it is a do-not-miss event, introducing you to some of the weirdest traditions that make you go “hmmm.” And then “ooo.” Then “OH YEAH … YAY!”

Curious? You should be.

Grab a wig, a boa (feather or constrictor) and come.on.down.

Bizarre Bazaar takes place Saturday, April 12th from 2pm to 10pm at Porch, 115 Ave C (Between 7th & 8th). 212.475.1515.

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